How to camouflage the fact you are eating potato chips... Make cookies!!!

Potato Chip Cookies

Ingredients:
1 pound butter (softened)
1 cup sugar
2 teaspoons vanilla
1 cup crushed potato chips
3 cups flour
as needed powdered sugar

Directions:
Cream butter and sugar together, then add vanilla and potato chips.
Gradually add flour.
Drop from teaspoon onto ungreased cookie sheet.
Bake at 350 degrees for 10 minutes until edges just turn brown.
While cookies are still warm, dust lightly with powdered sugar.

Yields 48 cookies

Recipe found on http://www.northpole.com

Take That Clown Monkeys!

Standard Units

Depending what age you are, you maybe not be aged in the same units as others...
Babies start off in hours, then days, then weeks, then months, which include sub-units of weeks and days.
A toddlers age is measure in years, with a possibility of fractions at the quarter, half and three-quarter way points.
Depending on the pre-teen, they may eagerly include the halfway point in their measurement of years.
As a teen, that extra precision tends to be dropped... Unless it's the parent talking about their childs' age.
As a young adult, it's a just a very straight forward number.
Mid-life we tend to just mention the decade we belong to, who needs more precise units than that?
Once a senior, we're back to a straight forward number, but that's more for the benefits of discounts.

Why stay standard... I am currently 30 years and 27 days old...

Listen You!!!

Hey you! Yeah you! With the checkered shirt... Listen!
You! With the short cropped woolen tie.... Listen!!
Yeah you! With the big round glasses and messy comb over-esk hair... Listen!
Yeah! You there! With the corduroy jacket with elbow patches... LISTEN!!!

How To Uniquely Eat Lunch In One Easy Step

Wear a turquoise Mickey Mouse t-shirt at a restaurant filled with people wearing monotone colored suits.

Chop Suey Hero

There was once a plate of noodles
Filled with oodles and oodles
Of chop suey that makes me mad
Because they do not make me glad
To be in my tummy
They are not very yummy
But along came a guy
Dressed casual, not in a tie
Who made them go *kaplooie*
And saved me from the chop suey!

Why do we listen to 'they'?!?

What do 'they' know?
Who decided 'they' are right?
Certainly not me!
Why?
Because the Madame Bakery Lady would not ask me how I am and how others (who are not with me) are doing...
Because the Butcher, whom I pass on the sidewalk 7 blocks away from the Boucherie would not stop to say hello...
Because a stranger would not smile at me as we cross paths near the metro...
And because a somewhat homeless looking man would not politely offer me his newspaper when I come to sit in a public square and insist because he was done reading it and was on his way somewhere else.